What say ye? pt 2

  1. Home /
  2. Questions /
  3. Life And Society

by eddie1 on January 9th, 2007

eddie1

QUESTION

Help answer this question below.

Why do you think some people remain single?

Sort answers by:                                          Greatness / Likes                                         Date submitted                                     

ANSWERS. 49 helpful answers below.

    • by Sunblynd 5.0 on January 9th, 2007

      Sunblynd 5.0

       

      Because living with someone day in and day out can drive one up the wall. Here are just a few of the reasons why I enjoy being single… It’s nice coming home to silence, my dog greets me however, but he doesn’t ever bitch if I have to work late and miss dinner. He’s very clean and tidy, he has never left me any suprises accept the time he drooled in my boots. My house is always fairly and easily clean, no one tells me when to take the trash out, and I don’t ever have dirty dishes in the sink from a rude roomate or a girlfriend who thinks her coochie is made of gold and she doesn’t ever have to clean up after herself because her mommy told her so?

      Speaking of that, it’s easier for me to look in my medicine cabinet these days, instead of the mass biochemistry set and toilet accessories that comes with a live in girlfriend, I have much more space for my shaving cream, toothpaste, floss, mouthwash, etc. etc. Oh yeah! While were in the bathroom, since I am single and live alone I am free to keep the lid up if I want to, I also notice my toilet paper supply lasts longer, the water isn’t blue, and I don’t have any underthings hanging from my bathroom curtain rod.

      My bedroom is quite and peaceful, just as it should be, I don’t have to hear you snore, and you don’t have to hear me, nope, can’t put your cold feet on me anymore. I have all this extra closet space for my stuff, and don’t have to trip over anyones shoes or apparrel to get to it.

      I cook and eat what I want and like and don’t have to worry about appeasing someone else or wondering if they are going to like my cooking or not. I don’t have to fight for or play hide and seek for the remote control. I can watch football without interuption. I can invite to my home whomever I want without having to ask permission.

      I think the real reason why people stay single is that there is a personal peace of mind that is aquired in the silence of being single, as I just described my life is nothing short of serenity.

       

      12 comments | Post one | Permalink

    • by Amy on March 2nd, 2009

      Amy

       

      Great question. +4

      Well, it seems like people have given good answers. “Fear of being hurt ” comes to mind–but also, I think for some people, the single life is what they’re most happy with.

      There’s a great section in the bible I’m reminded of written by the apostle Paul–thoughts on marriage and singleness. There are some great, thought-provoking thoughts . It’s from 1 Corinthians 7, in the MSG (the capital words are mine):

      A GIFT “…Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me – a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is. God gives the gift of the single life to some, the gift of the married life to others.

      GET MARRIED IF YOU CAN’T MANAGE YOUR DESIRES/EMOTIONS “I do, though, tell the unmarried and widows that singleness might well be the best thing for them, as it has been for me. But if they can’t manage their desires and emotions, they should by all means go ahead and get married. The difficulties of marriage are preferable by far to a sexually tortured life as a single.

      ADDITIONAL STRESS “…There’s certainly no sin in getting married, whether you’re a virgin or not. All I am saying is that when you marry, you take on additional stress in an already stressful time, and I want to spare you if possible.

      KEEP IT SIMPLE “I do want to point out, friends, that time is of the essence. There is no time to waste, so don’t complicate your lives unnecessarily. Keep it simple – in marriage, grief, joy, whatever. Even in ordinary things – your daily routines of shopping, and so on. Deal as sparingly as possible with the things the world thrusts on you. This world as you see it is on its way out. I want you to live as free of complications as possible.

      TIME WITH JESUS FREE OF DISTRACTIONS “When you’re unmarried, you’re free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I’m trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions.

      DECIDING “If a man has a woman friend to whom he is loyal but never intended to marry, having decided to serve God as a ‘single,’ and then changes his mind, deciding he should marry her, he should go ahead and marry. It’s no sin; it’s not even a ‘step down’ from celibacy, as some say. On the other hand, if a man is comfortable in his decision for a single life in service to God and it’s entirely his own conviction and not imposed on him by others, he ought to stick with it.

      SPIRITUALLY AND MORALLY RIGHT “Marriage is spiritually and morally right and not inferior to singleness in any way, although as I indicated earlier, because of the times we live in, I do have pastoral reasons for encouraging singleness.”

      GOD DEFINES YOUR LIFE “Don’t be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God’s place for you. Live and obey and love and believe right there. God, not your marital status, defines your life….Friends, stay where you were called to be. God is there. Hold the high ground with him at your side.”

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by Universe Of Life on January 11th, 2007

      Universe Of Life

       

      An old married man once told me

      You can’t go through life being happy you have to get married sooner or later.

      Ha!

      It was only a joke and I was 16, funny at the time.

       

      3 comments | Post one | Permalink

    • by Tantric on January 11th, 2007

      Tantric

       

      I am single, but by no choice of my own. I fear that I may stay single, again not by my own choice. I simply have terrible luck when it comes to finding a suitible partner, I was married for 13 years and for the last four years I tried to hold it all together, but the attempts were futile, that marriage disolved 6 years ago, I have not ever remarried but I have dated and been in 2 long term reltion ships since then and both of them turned to crap because they thought the gras was greener on the other side, I got left and cheated on by those. I have been single now for 4 months and haven’t even dated anyone, as much as I would like to I haven’t met anyone that fits my criteria, I guess I’m picky.Maybe thats another reason why people stay single. Or maybe I’m at an age (45) that no one wants to take a chance on. I would love to meet a beautiuful woman, fall in love and look at a long term relationship, maybe marriage. I don’t know, ther are multiple reasons whyu people remain single, I just covered mine.

       

      1 comment | Post one | Permalink

    • by Wendora on January 9th, 2007

      Wendora

       

      I was wondering the same thing the other day about this guy named “Junior” that I know. He is 41, has a good job, not terrible looking and he has never been married. Maybe he just likes not answering to anyone? His mom and dad had a lot of drama in the marriage, maybe that was enough excitement for his lifetime.

       

      2 comments | Post one | Permalink

    • by Spunts.answered 67 questions in 1 hour. on January 11th, 2007

      Spunts.answered 67 questions in 1 hour.

       

      people remain single because they didn’t take a partner while they were young.sadly enough,the longer they wait, the more difficult it is for them to get married.marriage requires unending tolerance and that is something single people lack.i know it is not pleasant to hear your partner snore,burp etc.but it’s a part of the package.the love and comfort the two of you would share will certainly outweigh the occasional unpleasantness.don’t be afraid to share your independence.there is no need to remain single when there are billions of loving people out there.as you get older you would need someone to take care of you.i have been married to my wife for 30 years now and if there is infact,life after death,i would continuosly keep marrying her.
      unfortunately,there is no such thing as life after death.when this life is gone,it’s gone forever.so enjoy it while you can.LET’S GIVE IT UP FOR LOVE!CHEERS.

       

      4 comments | Post one | Permalink

    • by Anonymous on January 9th, 2007

      Anonymous

       

      They get along better living alone then living with another person. Simple as that. Also they are probably very independent and want things exactly their way. They aso might not be terribly good at intimacy long term and close up. The only way to get that is to live alone.

       

      2 comments | Post one | Permalink

    • by xxx on March 2nd, 2009

      xxx

       

      Either they dont want a relationship or they just haven’t found the right person. Its easier for some people than others.

       

      1 comment | Post one | Permalink

    • by Lady Justice on July 22nd, 2008

      Lady Justice

       

      Some people are looking for the right person, others don’t have the finances, some are afraid of getting hurt, while some just don’t have the patience for irresponsible people.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by taclumsa on January 16th, 2007

      taclumsa

       

      thaey don’t someone, or they don’t want some one, think about all the drama in a relationship!

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by EarthAngel on January 11th, 2007

      EarthAngel

       

      My personal opinion is that for some people I think they choose to stay single.They like to have that specific kind of freedom that married or attached people don’t have. For others I think it’s that they may have some sort of issue that prevents them from marriage,such as a trust issue or self asteem issue. This is just my opinion.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by xxxxxxxxxx on January 11th, 2007

      xxxxxxxxxx

       

      i think it depends on the person. some people just dont get along with being around someone for any length of time. in others cases, they cant find the right person for them, and then there are people like my boyfriends aunt. she was with a man for over 7 years. and after all that time he told her that he didnt want to marry her, he didnt want to settle down. she never was able to really get passed that. it broke her heart.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by thickalious on January 22nd, 2007

      thickalious

       

      i think that people that remain single like the fact they don’t have to commit to any one.My other reason is that maybe they’ve been hurt and are looking for that special someone.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by theallknowing on January 19th, 2007

      theallknowing

       

      some people remain single because they are scared of commitment and they dont want to hurt anyone. some people are different and prefer being alone and only looking out for themselves. not too many that i know if though because people are dependant on eachother in some way or another.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by staffie on January 11th, 2007

      staffie

       

      because some people are not ready to settle down and some people like to be on their own then they dont have to answer to anyone. maybe they have had a bad experience in the past which has made it difficult to trust anyone.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by junpai on April 19th, 2009

      junpai

       

      Some people define their couple “relationship” differently than others. It’s not always wonderful smelling roses in these relationships. Some do the relationship just to share expenses. Some seem to enjoy weekly battles in arguments. Some are attempting happiness. And some have truly found happiness. So just because two people are together doesn’t necessarily mean it’s love, or happiness, or fulfillment.

      Modern living can allow a person to remain single. In the past, this was never possible. One had to be together with some situation be it a family/extended family, an owner of some sort, etc. Marriage in the past also didn’t exist for love. It was to allow for many offspring to be produced so one could have sons and daughters to work their land. Even today, some cultures don’t allow singleness. In my opinion, Latin American culture is a lot like this. An unmarried son or daughter will continue to live with extended family only unless they are wedded.

      So we can’t assume that coupled relationships are always happy. Sometimes the person is fulfilling that social expectations placed on them by either family or society.

      If you have a comment, I’d love to hear it.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by junpai on April 19th, 2009

      junpai

       

      One person in this forum wrote that maybe “the single person” doesn’t have the finances to get married. What exactly does that mean? If they have the “finances” to live in general (covering their expenses), what are the additional “finances” necessary to getting married?

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by curiousgeorge on March 2nd, 2009

      curiousgeorge

       

      some people just prefer that way. Some people don’t want to live in partnership or they have to high standards.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by timetogetserious on January 11th, 2007

      timetogetserious

       

      Because they choose to. Not everyone wants to be with someone in a partner or soul mate sense.

      Perhaps they are selfish ? I don’t know. Not my cup of tea, but hey, each to their own.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by jammnwright on January 20th, 2007

      jammnwright

       

      uh, cause they might be smart, and not want the drama right now, or they are using their time on earth wisely, or other people might just annoy them.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by Magickman on January 13th, 2008

      Magickman

       

      I think many people remain single to avoid the stress and conflict of coupled life.

      Marriage and children are huge sources of aggravation, anger, and frustration, but they can be avoided by staying single.

       

    • by asairel on January 11th, 2007

      asairel

       

      not ready for a relationship or too busy doing thier life, afraid of commitment or just decided never to have a relationship at all..

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by simonsaidso on April 15th, 2010

      simonsaidso

       

      It could be how some people are raised. I have a twin brother and a younger brother that is 1.2 years younger than me. We were/are dependent on eachother all our lives sharing and encouraging. We’ve always had a close type of companionship and never needed friends.

      Our relationship is strange. Like our parents we rarely talk about anything serious and when something serious comes up such as ‘conflict’ it always gets filtered and by passed with humour or silence.

      We were raised non dinominational and had Christianity crammed down our throats because the only thing our parents had in common was ‘us’ and being Christians. As a result we were sheltered and not allowed to discover things ourselves (such as relationships with girls).

      I hate and love being single. I don’t do it by choice but I also don’t apply effort to find ‘the one’ either. I have had crushes with so many girls but have been too afraid to establish any relationship with them because I don’t know how. And when I do try they put up a wall and won’t let me in. So my wall gets thicker each time because I don’t want to get hurt anymore.

      At one time I had a friend that was completely open to me about her life (which blew my mind because she was very attractive and was the one that was persued and started calling me every night so that we could hang out). We did things that couples would do (except anything physical). When I told her how I felt about her she found it preposterus that we’d ever be a couple. I felt used and teased for the last time and was hurt pretty bad by it. And people wonder why I have such poor esteem.

      It doesn’t make sense to me. Girls I like or that like me only like me at a distance. Everytime I try to get close they sever the connection. Every time. I’ve had my heart broken too many times to care anymore. Theres just something about me that people don’t like or don’t need. I’ve always had a hard time fitting in with any group.

      I have been single my entire life. It seems that is what God wants.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by .. on June 27th, 2011

      ..

       

      All (very high quality person) or nothing (prefer the positive side of being single)..

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by Sentry on July 22nd, 2008

      Sentry

       

      I think it comes down to a good job, for me took years to find what I wanted to do ( a professor) and even now I adjunct which is relatively tenuous, so being single at 41 is no accident

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by MHfreak1991 on March 2nd, 2009

      MHfreak1991

       

      cuz relationships are confusing sometimes. or like right now for me my gf is kinda making me mad, and some people dont wanna go thru stuff like that

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by Anonymous on March 2nd, 2009

      Anonymous

       

      Because they had their heart broken so many times, they just don’t believe in romantic happiness anymore. They don’t want to go thru that hurt and brokenness once again.

       

    • by Sid on March 2nd, 2009

      Sid

       

      Many reasons. They may think they are too ugly, they may BE too ugly, too shy, low self-esteem, too work-obsessed, too unlikeable, not willing to settle for second-best, or may simply be not interested in having a relationship with anyone.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by needtoknow on July 22nd, 2008

      needtoknow

       

      Some people are just not interested in a marriage, others have been hurt too many times and just can’t do it again. Some people are just asexual and don’t care about a sexual relationship with anyone, so they are single.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by kathy w on March 2nd, 2009

      kathy w

       

      i really like me. I dont think Im conceited I just like me. I dont think I need or want anybody else to make my life different. Its really really good right now. Im 52 years old and do not regret the way things are.I really love it. It makes me sad to hear of people looking for “another half”, I hope they can become whole soon.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by AsKandUshallRecieVe on March 2nd, 2009

      AsKandUshallRecieVe

       

      Maybe because they have not found what they are looking for or because they have things in their life that they are trying to accomplish at the moment and feel that a relationship would only get in the way.

       

      No comments. Post one | Permalink

    • by FizzyFjord on March 2nd, 2009

      FizzyFjord

       

      There are a lot of benefits. A partner takes a lot of time, energy, and money. Some people would like to devote that time to something else. Some people have lost a partner and don’t want to risk losing another. Some people just aren’t that interested in romance. Some people, like the trumpet teacher at my university, think that marriage is an arbitrary social construct and that people only get married because that’s the social expectation that has been forced on them. Whatever their reasons, many of them are perfectly happy.

       

  • by singleme on March 27th, 2009

    singleme

     

    Why some people need to remain single

    For some of us it’s a choice, for others it’s a forced situation and no choice comes into play. So, I write this from a perspective of a person who is single because of both instances raised previously.
    I won’t bore you with the schematics of my personal situation, I will just write this from my perspective.
    From a young age many societies instill in people that to have some sort of social value one should be in a relationship, buy a house, pro create and instill these values in their offspring. Now let’s look at the situation from a broad prospective and delve away from an individualist point of view. The world today is vastly over populated, cities and more importantly eco systems are overstretched and in many instances at breaking point. Social environments are currently in dire straits, the gap between the poor and the rich raises and widens. Education systems are under pressure. Now if the world is full of people let’s say for arguments sake 6 Billion people, then by me not having children and not being in a relationship is the world going to stop spinning? Of course it will continue to spin just as sure as people are going to continue to have children

    Now I mentioned previously many of us have been instilled with this need that we must be in a relationship to have some worth, while in no way do I attempt to undermine those of us who have this desire. I have nothing against those of us who wish to be in such situations. I have come to conclusion that this is not for me. In today’s western society I believe that in general people have become more self centered. Is this due to technology? Or some other reason I am not sure. I am simply commenting on the world that I see. Also people in general have become more superficial and they must have this or that to be happy. Have people become more selfish due to money? Again I am not sure. So if these points that I have raised are true then does it not seem to be contradictory to still instill this need to be in a relationship?? How can one be in a relationship when one is self centered? Some of you may say love and being loved is the purpose of a relationship. Love is a notion that works for some and more power to them. I have played the game of love and I, personally have lost. So I have decided to put down my racquet and play that game no more. I have decided that it is not worth the hurt and anguish. So as means of self protection then this I decided not to play that game. A sad story?? You may think so but I believe one needs to make the best of the situation one finds himself or herself in. That is what I have decided to do. One can love and be loved not necessarily in the nuclear family situation, there are other ways to be loved and love. I am not talking in particular about the “free love” of the 60’s but if that is what you go for have fun and be safe.
    You single people out there know just as well as I do, that because you maybe of a certain age and not in a relationship, then there must be something wrong with you. Everyone else wants it and so should you. So the fact that you’re not in one for whatever reason then you must be strange. The fact that you don’t attempt to pursue one the only explanation is that you are damaged goods. Well you know just as well as I that this is not the case. Now reading a comment written in this forum before “I must not be girlfriend material” Sure that may be the case and you may personally believe that but why put such a negative connotation on yourself??? Does being a single man or woman mean that you are not self worth. I can tell you with a resounding No! Maybe you where not put on this earth to procreate and add to the population. Maybe you where placed on this earth to contribute in another way, maybe you where placed on this earth by whatever entity you choose to believe in to contribute to world and leave it to be a better place. Now if this comes to be true then due to fact that you are single does that make your future achievements less notable? I think not

    So go against the grains of society and be happy with yourself, love yourself and find content in solitude. Once you do you will find that you are the best friend that you can ever have.

     

    No comments. Post one | Permalink

Want to attach an image to your answer? Click here.

Did this answer your question? If not, then ask a new question or create a poll.

From the Web

MORE QUESTIONS. Additional questions in this category.

You’re reading Why do you think some people remain single?

  • ABOUT US

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: